Eliminating “Should” from Your Marriage

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Words have the unique ability to shape a marriage. At some point, we have all seen our partners walk away with renewed confidence after we used words of encouragement to build them back up after a bad day. On the other hand, we also know the pain that can come from speaking harshly during a disagreement. Out of all the words that I have used in my marriage, the word “should” has proven to always bring at least one of us down. While it seems innocuous enough at first, this one word has the power to send you into a spiral of negative thinking that chips away at your ability to revel in marital bliss.

My Problem With Should


We all have an inner dialogue that serves as a gentle nudge to become our greater selves. Yet, I recently discovered that most of my thoughts went something like this: 

“Should I be washing dishes instead of snuggling on the couch?”
“I should be writing more blogs during my baby’s nap time.”
“Should I be further in my career by now?”

As you can probably see, this constant questioning of myself and what I believed I should be doing slowly began to chip away at my self-esteem. Social media also didn’t help. Whenever I felt down on myself or frustrated with work, I’d log onto my accounts and there it was-tons of reminders of how great everyone else’s life is going. Yet, we all know that everyone puts their best face forward online. So, then I began to wonder if everyone else was caught up in this trap of comparisons. You see, living under the constant belief that I should be doing better was making forget to appreciate all of the good things in my life. 

Our Problem with Should


While tearing myself up with thoughts of what I should or should not be doing was one thing, I found this mindset creeping into my marriage. I’d talk to my friends about our marital problems (I know, I know, bad choice), and they would return my vents with vehement advice like, “You shouldn’t tolerate that,” and “You shouldn’t do things like that.” While hearing my woes backed up with sympathetic rants from my friends gave me temporary pleasure, I discovered that it only made me look at my marriage with negativity. Instead of giving an opportunity to strengthen our marriage with forgiveness and understanding, I began to think about all the ways in which my partner should be doing better. Needless to say, it wasn’t long before all of this negativity made it clear that I needed to change.

Choosing Acceptance Instead of Should


When I saw my marriage begin to struggle, I knew that it was time for me to think about my true priorities. Throughout the past couple of years, I had forgotten to find joy in the simple things that truly make life special. Instead of thinking about what either of us should be doing, I began to focus on simply appreciating the moment. You see, every moment we spend with our spouse is an opportunity to deepen our love, and it is sometimes those little moments that give us the biggest opportunity to improve our relationship. When my partner leaves dirty clothes on the floor, speaks out in frustration or fails to live up to one of my random expectations, I just think about how neither of us are perfect and how beautiful it is that we have chosen to love each other unconditionally. Since I’ve adopted this mindset, we laugh more, we support each other, and my husband has even made an effort to offer me the same gift of acceptance.

Feel the Freedom of Unconditional Love

Letting go of the word should has transformed my marriage, and it has led us to a much deeper, stronger relationship that transcends our worldly disagreements. You can feel this freedom today by embracing the concept of unconditional love that comes from choosing to be content no matter what happens in your marriage. You and your spouse both came into the marriage with flaws as well as strengths, and contentment is a choice. By following this simple concept, you can delete that should-list and begin to enjoy the freedom that comes from total acceptance-of yourself and your spouse.

Time to Get Serious About Engaging Millennials

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Ah, millennials. One of the greatest mysteries of our time. Even just five years can make the difference between being in or out of the loop, and it’s definitely showing among generations. As the Baby Boomers of the 30s and Gen X seek to adapt to the rapidly changing present, millennials seem to hold the key. But how do you reach out to them? And how do you communicate in a way that’s as effective as it is authentic? 

The answer lies in taking advantage of the tech that rules our world today and using it to connect with millennials in the environment they know best – the Internet. 

Who Are Millennials Anyway?


Millennials are the largest generation to exist. They were all born between 1980 and 1995. There are 88 million of them worldwide and in just a decade’s time will dominate 75 percent of the global workforce. 

They’re some of the most ambitious, educated and driven individuals the world has ever known and the oldest of them only just hit 35. But many of them are also lost and seeking a means to establish themselves in industries unequipped to handle them. That’s why leaders all over the world need to get with the program and truly understand how to engage millennials.

Finding the Right Channels



With so many of them entering the workforce and drifting around, it’s critical that millennials learn from people at the top of their careers. For both the industry and posterity’s sake, knowledge must be transmitted in a manner that is engaging, effective and establishes the type of understanding today’s millennials need to be the leaders of the future. 

That being said, getting in touch with the right millennial candidates requires that leaders understand how their brains work. We aren’t the most patient bunch. We don’t have the time or desire to listen to long-winded lectures and stale, generic pitches. We want people to ditch the robotic corporate jargon and talk to us on a personal level.

That’s why the Internet is the prime place to recruit millennials. Using digital channels like Facebook, Twitter and WordPress are guaranteed means of finding a wide millennial audience that’s willing to listen if you’ve got something to say. 

Bringing Millennials to Work


recent survey of hundreds of business leaders from the US, Canada, Australia and India discovered that 87.3 percent of the key Association stakeholders believed that attracting millennials was an increasingly difficult challenge. This was supported by the 94.3 percent of the survey respondents who believed that mentoring should be one of the major focuses when it comes to engaging millennials. 

Today, virtual mentoring is a popular practice that strips the traditional view of a mentorship and replaces face-to-face counsel with virtual equivalents like Skype video calls and meetings on Google Hangouts. One of the advantages of these virtual mentoring programs is that mentors are able to compliment all of their counseling with a slew of handpicked online resources and tools that their students can then use to truly get the most out of their experience. 

The Advantages of Virtual Mentoring

Mentoring is always going to come at a cost, but you can spare your budget by taking a virtual path. Since you’ll be able to utilize your computer and pre-existing Internet connection, the money that you have allocated for the mentorship will be better invested in essential resources and other necessities. 

You’ll also be far more likely to receive a large response when you market a virtual mentorship, not only due to its digital nature but also due to the flexibility and comfort it provides candidates. Even though you’re capable of running a mentorship from your computer, you can still turn a profit by charging mentees a small participation fee. Just make sure there is enough incentive presented in your marketing strategy, otherwise we’ll just move on and save our money.

Summary

Mentoring millennials is a pressing need in business today. If you truly want to maximize on the opportunity that millennials present, learn our language. Turning to the digital world will enable you to connect with us millennials in our natural habitat and interact with us in the ways we’re most responsive to. 

Marketing and mentoring to millennials is the number one way to remodel your brand and stay relevant, and the secret behind that lies in some research, patience and willingness to adapt.

Four Destructive Effects of Micro-Managing by Company Founders

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If you own a small business that needs to hire employees or independent contractors, be careful about micro-managing. Many founders make this serious mistake. It involves telling people exactly how to complete each task. When the owner of a new business personally performs all of the work, there’s no reason why this person shouldn’t do it his or her way. However, it can become highly problematic if the founder insists on controlling staff members’ every action.

It’s certainly a difficult transition to make. If you started a business from scratch, you have probably invested a great deal of time and energy to personalize it with your values. Understandably, you may feel that employees and contractors should consistently uphold your vision. Perhaps you’d prefer to keep doing everything yourself, but the company has grown to the point that you no longer have enough time. Unfortunately, this mindset might cause you to interfere in workers’ jobs to the point that it ruins your business.

This often becomes a problem when founders hire marketing experts. Although you may recognize that you don’t have the time to promote your business, you might still feel a need to control the strategy. As a result, you’ll tell the marketer how and when to do everything. Sadly, this leads to a harmful cycle that raises expenses, wastes time and results in less income.

A business owner may start by informing new employees about his or her vision for the company. Perhaps you’ll go into detail about your expectations and standards while denying that you plan to interfere with their work. There’s nothing wrong with this, but it’s a sign that micro-managing could soon emerge. Unfortunately, this behavior often indicates an unwillingness to accept another person’s ideas. You might reject a marketer’s plans and demand an assortment of changes.

Although you have hired an expert to enhance your company’s marketing efforts, you may force this professional to adopt your own techniques. Some founders don’t even realize they’re doing this. It results in uncreative promotional campaigns that you could’ve developed without paying someone to work for you. Staff members in the marketing department eventually learn to uphold this methodology at all times. It has four major negative consequences:

1. A company’s founder cannot bring about greater growth if he or she focuses on micro-managing employees. If you started a business, your public relations efforts are crucial to expanding the company. Micro-managing destroys these opportunities because it consumes all of the founder’s time. Some business owners devote countless hours to carefully monitoring staff behavior, scrutinizing their work and instructing personnel about ways to perform every action.

2. Many employees will quit if founders micro-manage them. Although money remains an important factor, relative freedom attracts many individuals to startups. If they find that a boss constantly scrutinizes their decisions and demands changes, this may result in dissatisfaction. As staff members defect to other firms, your company will need to spend more money on recruiting and training. You’ll waste time interviewing potential employees when you could be performing productive work.

3. Staff members will suppress their creativity and avoid using specialized skills or knowledge. Company founders frequently fail to recognize the impact of getting involved in every project. Nonetheless, their interference eventually has a tremendously negative impact. Employees and independent contractors learn to only complete tasks in ways that suit the founder’s highly restrictive requirements. They know that new ideas will only draw criticism, so business owners cannot fully benefit from their skills.

4. Micro-managing harms staff morale. Although it’s true that employees occasionally need corrective guidance, constant interference fosters a negative attitude. Staff members may feel that they lack the abilities needed to perform their jobs. Although you might only intend to do what’s best for your company, your efforts could obstruct creativity in a way that harms everyone. It’s important to realize that employees have the qualifications required to complete their work and need the freedom to do so.

The bottom line is that micro-managing wastes time and money. It prevents a company founder from spending time on the high-level objectives that will help his or her business remain successful. After you carefully select an employee or contractor, it’s vital to let this person complete tasks independently. Trust your staff to do what’s right, and recognize that no one can control everything in a company that has grown to a substantial size.

Financial Decisions To Make Once You Tie The Knot

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From choosing a color scheme for your wedding to creating a guest list, getting married means making many decisions. With so much excitement, it is easy to overlook the importance of sitting down and discussing your finances as a married couple. Although financial decisions can be somewhat stressful when you are combining households, coming to an agreement on these following areas will set you up for a stronger financial future by making sure that you are both on the same page regarding how your finances are managed.

Should You Combine Bank Accounts or Keep Them Separate?

Turning two into one means more than just making your matrimonial vows. One of the first decisions you will need to make is whether or not you prefer to merge bank accounts. For most couples, creating a combined account is important for reinforcing that even your finances are part of the partnership. If you do prefer to keep your accounts separate, then creating a joint account that is used for major bills will ensure that you both have full knowledge of how your main financial obligations are being managed.

How Will Debt Be Shared?

It is important to understand that the answer to this question will depend upon several factors since your state will have laws that could influence how debt is shared. While most states view debt that occurred before marriage as being only that sole person’s responsibility, you may discover that you are responsible for any debt that your spouse takes on after the marriage. Regardless of how debt is divided up, it will be best to keep in mind that making paying off debt a priority will only benefit your marriage. Sit down and assess your combined debt, and allot payments in your budget that will pay off the highest interest rate accounts first.

What Will Be Your Budget?

When two working adults enter a marriage, it is easy to feel as though you have plenty of income with a dual income. Yet, it is still essential to create a budget that you both agree upon. Begin by deciding what type of tool will best help you manage your budget. Some couples still prefer the pencil and paper method while others utilize smartphone apps and other software that can provide each person instant access to the latest stats. Once you have your preferred system, talk about how the money you have left over after bills will be distributed. As you do so, make sure you agree upon luxuries such as dinners out, gym memberships and money spent on hobbies.

Who Will Make the Payments?

During your first year of marriage, the last thing you want to discover is that neither of you has paid a major bill. This is why you will need to discuss who will be responsible for handling each payment. For some couples, it is easiest for one person to handle all of the monthly payments, while others prefer to divide it up evenly. While either method will work, it is important to remember to add in new accounts as they arise. If one person is handling the payments, then make sure to communicate so that the other partner can take over some if they begin to feel overwhelmed.

How Will You Plan for Long Term Needs?

In the rosy glow of newlywed bliss, the last thing you want to think about is something bad happening to you or your partner. However, it is important to plan for the future. Decide now about how much life insurance you will need and how assets would be divided should the worst happen. Then, formalize your decisions with a written will that will ensure you have legal proof of your decision. As time passes, remember to reassess this decision since career changes, having children and other life events could alter what works best for your situation.

While most couples touch upon finances at some point during their engagement, it is critical to hold a serious conversation once you are officially married. Not only will making these decisions now protect your financial future, but it will also prevent those arguments about money that every couple dreads. Finally, make sure to stay on top of your decisions by planning weekly financial dates that will allow you to discuss where you are toward meeting your goals while ensuring that both of you are happy with the plan.

10 Pieces of Marriage Advice

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Happily Ever After takes more than just love to work. Although it may seem hard to imagine you and your spouse ever having troubles beyond a few arguments, marriage is a journey filled with all the twists, turns and discoveries of any great adventure. In order to make it work, you need patience, dedication and maybe even a few words of wisdom. Having them to refer to as you start your lives together is a great way to start things off on the right foot after saying “I do”.
1. Marriage is About Money.
When you combine your life with someone else’s, you’re tying every aspect of your life to theirs. This is why marriage has to be treated with all the attentiveness as any other financial or legal transaction. Talking about estates, wills, bank accounts and yes, even those controversial prenuptial agreements, is part of the deal and can save you a world of stress later on.

2. Stop Asking Why.
Constantly scrutinizing every reason and trying to understand why your partner said or did something will only rob you of our happiness in the present moment. Learn not to sweat the small stuff and only ask why when the reason truly matters.

3. There Are No Winners in Arguments
There are two sides to every story and the same is true for arguments. When you’re married, arguing shouldn’t be about proving who is right or wrong, but instead working together to find a compromise that leaves both of you happy.

4. You Can’t Change Someone
Having confidence in yourself is essential, because without it, you’ll start to criticize aspects in your partner that you don’t like about you. Once you feel secure in who you are, don’t try and make your husband or wife fit your idea of who they should or could be. Instead, love them as they are while always encouraging them to strive for greatness.

5. Just Because a Relationship Ends Doesn’t Mean It Wasn’t Worth It
So many people feel like they’re failures if their marriage ends, but that simply isn’t true. If you and your partner decide to go your separate ways, the memories you shared, life you made and anything else you had together doesn’t lose its value.

6. It’s Okay to Go to Bed Angry
Despite the common marriage adage that encourages you to never fall asleep with an argument unresolved, sometimes a good night’s rest is exactly what you need. Well, maybe you won’t sleep like a log with the night’s words still fresh in your mind, but the hours until morning will help your emotions settle and you’ll both be able to talk things out in the morning with a clear head. And coffee. Coffee helps everything.

7. Anger is Just Fear in Armor
When you’re mad, ask yourself what you’re afraid of. Talk about this reason with your partner. It will bring you closer together and spare a lot of hurt feelings.

8. Don’t Rely on Your Spouse for Self-Esteem
Just as children are taught to be their greatest confidants, adults should follow the same rule. It’s far too easy to place all of your emotional cards in a relationship, and when you truly give someone everything, this also includes your self-esteem.

You have to be able to build yourself up and be confident in who you are no matter what, because people who are tend to be more open to hearing different opinions. Instead of feeling attacked when someone disagrees with them, they’re able to assess the situation and maybe even adopt a new viewpoint.

9. Kids Change Everything 
There’s no getting around this one. For better and for worse, kids will change your marriage. It doesn’t mean they’re any less of a joy to be had. They will fill your lives with incredible joy, but they also require new sacrifices that you both may not be as thrilled about making as you try to pretend you are. Don’t fake it. It’s okay to be afraid or not like certain changes. Confide in each other. Marriage is about sharing your happiness as well as your fears.

10. Would I Stay With Them If They Were Dying?
This sounds like a horrible question to ask, but it’s really the knowledge of our true answers that make us cringe. It doesn’t make you a bad person to hesitate, but it does mean you should reevaluate your relationship. If you’re not already married, then this is a point where you should consider ending things. And if you are, then it’s definitely time to make some changes.

The same holds true when asked in reverse. If you were dying, do you know with 100 percent certainty that they’d be there for you? If your relationship isn’t able to handle massive change – both good and bad – then don’t hate yourself or the other person for it. Just don’t get married.

The Reason for Marriage

There are a million reasons to hate marriage. Your parents got a divorce and scarred you for life. You think it’s a sham. It’s nothing more than a government transaction and has no real value.

All of those points hold truth, but there’s also plenty of counters. Most importantly, marriage is a cultural symbol that you love someone above all others. You may say “but who cares what society thinks”? But it’s not about proving your love to society. Marriage, at its core, is about two people agreeing to stick together through thick and thin, no matter what. It’s a grand display of commitment that translates to an incredible expression of love, and you should never settle for being with anyone who makes you feel like you fall short of deserving that.

Enhance Your Marriage With These Simple Steps:

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Let go of comparison and embrace your unique marriage.  Comparison is the killer of many marriages. I’ve seen far too many marriages go through rough patches after a lot of “I did the dishes, while you watched TV….   Well… I cleaned out the car while you were at the store.”   Don’t get into this cycle.

Even when marriage becomes a test, you can grow closer together. Always remember that you can learn and grow from every hard time you go through together. Try and come out on the other side stronger and closer then ever. No matter how bad things may get, you can learn from them and more importantly, you can grow from them.

You have got to rely on each other – be the shoulder for the other one to cry on.  You can ban together or move apart, so try to ban together in tough times. This is your person, who you picked because you enjoy being around them more than any other person in the world, so don’t forget this, even when you are upset.

Make time for your marriage each and every day.  Maybe it is 20 minutes talking every night, going on a morning jog together, or an evening walk, or maybe it’s as simple as eating breakfast together every morning, just the two of you.

Remembering why you said “I do” can strengthen and renew your marriage. If you forget the reasons, look back on your engagement times.  Remember your dating times.  Look at the person that you married and find the good in them.   Find their strengths and let go of the weaknesses.

Learning to simplify your commitments is key for a growing marriage. You have to find time to be together – and if that means letting go of the things that cause stress or take up too much time, so be it!

Make the time to date your spouse. Go out once a month or more, if you can.  Try and instate a regular date night into your routine that you can both look forward to! Take turns planning it every time and enjoy special time together.

Create space to talk with your spouse. Start a conversation or play a conversation game.  Even do a 5 question game where you can each ask 5 questions “If we could move anywhere, where would you want to be?”

Visit somewhere new together for a fresh adventure. This is great advice!   If you can experience new things together, it will be so much fun for both of you!

Take some time to learn your spouse’s personality type. I also suggest reading the 5 Love Languages – this book is a must-read for married couples.

Learning from others and sharing your struggles can be a great way to grow a deeper marriage. You have to trust each other and talk to one another. Bouncing feelings and ideas off of each other not only lifts the weight off of your shoulders, but also allows your partner to better see where you are coming from in order to help move forward.

Sometimes you will annoy each other, and that is okay. I heard one time that they key to being married is never falling out of love at the same time.   Yes, sometimes living with someone every day will get on your nerves.  They leave the towel on the floor or they leave their shoes out… remember that you can’t fester in that moment, but also know that it is normal.

Taking time to read about marriage can help you to constantly be growing. Finding marriage books or reading a book together is a great way to connect.

Speak life into each other. Your spouse needs to hear words of encouragement, too.  They need to know that you appreciate them.   Speaking kind words will build someone up quicker than anything I’ve ever seen.

Kiss more than you complain. Every day, kiss your spouse.   Kiss them ‘goodbye’ when they leave and ‘welcome home’ when they get back.

7 Ways To Become A Better Forgiver

1. Don’t Wait For An Apology

There will be times you’ll need to forgive in spite of a weak apology, and there will be other times that an apology isn’t even offered. Choose to forgive because it benefits you!

2. Practice Giving The Benefit Of The Doubt

Start with the belief that your spouse had good intentions or at least that they did not intend to hurt you.

3. Be Clear And Kind About Why You Hurt

When you are truly hurt, you deserve the chance to be heard, but avoid blaming and criticizing language when you explain yourself.

4. Remember You Are On The Same Team

Forgiveness can be a win-win situation. Stay out of the trap of being at odds with your spouse.

5. Accept An Apology When It Is Offered

You may need some time to internalize it, so don’t pressure yourself into acting like you are over it before you are. Forgive, but ask for some time to process your feelings if you need it.

6. Don’t Dig Up Buried Offenses

Nothing prevents healing like bringing up old wounds and reminding your spouse that you have not forgotten. A good forgiver leaves the past in the past.

7. Consider Extending Your Own Olive Branch

Even if you’re still feeling the sting of their offense, doing something nice for your spouse can bridge the gap between you just enough to help them know they are forgiven.

Simple Marriage Improving Tricks Worth Trying Before Spending On Couples Therapy

After the honeymoon phase is over, it often seems like all the excitement is gone, but it doesn’t have to be! These tricks and tips are designed for you to keep the good feelings and fun times rolling—and to weather the inevitable storms without totally sinking.

1. Compromise

Pick and choose your battles. You have the rest of your life to spend together, it might not be worth it to waste an afternoon arguing about why your husband forgot to take the trash out. After you get married, being able to blend your way and their way often takes on a new meaning.

2. Stay True To Yourself

Once you become someone’s spouse in life, you’re still you! Committing yourself to someone else does not mean that you are signing away the things that make you, you. Yes, now your life involves a partner, but if you forget about your own identity, you will eventually resent it. Make it a point to spend time alone doing the things that you love.

3. Acknowledge That Fighting Is Going to Happen

You are not going to fight less after you get married. End of story. It’s important to accept that some marital issues will never be resolved, which is why it’s especially important to remember #1 from above – compromise. It is equally important to know that persistence, good will, and humor can go a long way toward buffering couples against resentment and hostility.

In other words: Don’t freak out when you fight (because it’s inevitable), but do try to fight fair—and always remember that this person you’re fighting with is the love of your life. They can’t be all that bad!

4. Make Your Sex Life Work for Your Marriage

Don’t expect the same butterflies as you have early in a new relationship, instead, make sex about enjoying each other, being close, and keeping each other happy. Part of the excitement in the initial stage of a relationship, brain chemically speaking, is the novelty—everything is new. It is important for couples to seek out new opportunities together.

5. Give Thanks

Keeping love alive and flowing in your relationship is essential to being happy with each other. Set aside some time in your schedule to let each other know when you feel loved. Show your gratitude verbally, with flowers and candy, with dinners out, with a hug or a kiss— anything is better than nothing!

6. Be Honest with Yourself

By starting a conversation by taking some of the blame and responsibility instead of pointing the finger, you are providing room for your spouse to feel open and un attacked. Some couples get into a game of marital ‘chicken,’ in which each waits for the other to change. In the interim, the marriage can wither away because neither partner is willing to be the first to change. Instead of focusing only on your partner’s flaws, you should own up to your own, as well—and think about what you can do to create more marital bliss in your relationship.

8. Be Willing to Work to Make Your Relationship Thrive

You’ve probably heard this before, but that’s because it’s true: Having a good marriage takes intentional effort. It doesn’t just happen on its own. People who have great marriages work at it all the time.

Even just having some kind of ritual that shows you care about your bond—for example, making sure you kiss your spouse goodnight, or before you leave in the morning. And, hey, it definitely beats shelling out thousands of dollars on marriage counseling.

To read more marital tips, click here.

 

Ways To Better Communicate With Your Significant Other

Accept your spouse for who they are. Men and women communicate differently, and accepting this is key. While it may not be easy to change how you think and feel, it is easy to change your perspective. Accept who they are and how they best communicate. That may require you to approach them differently to have a more effective conversation. As long as you are learning and progressing together, you are on the right track. The problems start when either partner is unwilling to change their approach. Relationships are compromise. Before speaking, think long and hard about how they would approach you with a similar conversation. Follow their lead and speak to them in ways they can relate to.

Feed each others love languages. If you haven’t read the 5 Love Languages book by Gary Chapman, now is the time to do so. This book breaks down the various ways people feel most loved. There are so many different ways, and most importantly, everyone is different. For many it is in gifts. For others it is all about physical touch and affection. Make sure you figure out each others love languages and then USE them. When you feel loved, it is much easier to increase quality communication.

Leave emotions at the door. This is easier said than done for both men and women, but sometimes you just need to get logical about things. Yes, emotions are at the key of most relationships, but there are many situations where you need to check your emotions at the door and listen to your spouse and their thoughts from a logical calm point of view.

What often works best, especially when emotions are already running high, is physical space. Take a walk. Take deep breaths. Give yourself a few minutes to relax, because so often, during this time, things naturally fall into perspective and the simple minutes of silence between you two can often be enough to solve the problem.

Leave the past behind you. Make an agreement that each conversation will be about the here and now. Leave past grievances where they are – in the past. While you may wish to proceed with caution, avoid the urge to bring up past indiscretions or arguments. Instead, focus on the good things and the current situation as it stands alone.

Put down your phone. This is one of the biggest issues in communicating with your spouse. We forget that to do so, we need to focus on them. Our phones, computers, televisions and tablets have become attached to our hips. When it is time to get serious with your spouse, give them your full attention. Meaning: put away electronics and focus exclusively on them!

Desiring better communication with your spouse is something we should all strive for. No matter how many years you have been together, there is always room to change and grow. It is important that you focus on each other and continue to learn how to reach each other in the best way possible.

10 Reasons To Go On A Birthright Trip To Israel

Taglit- Birthright Israel provides a gift of first time, peer group; educational trips to Israel for Jewish young adults ages 18 to 26 from around the world.

It gives individuals the opportunity to make new friends and experience Israel in the most beautiful of ways. It’s also for people who are willing to step out of their comfort zone and try new things.

According to their website “The vision of Birthright Israel is to strengthen Jewish identity, Jewish communities and solidarity with Israel by providing a 10-day trip to Israel for young Jewish people.”

If you are Jewish and between the ages of 18 and 26, and you HAVEN’T taken advantage of this amazing and FREE opportunity, then this list is for you.

Here are the top 10 reasons why YOU should take advantage of this wonderful opportunity:

1. It’s the gift of a free trip! It’s your birthright.

2. You are young and you should travel while you can, and as much as you can. No excuses necessary. It is an educational and life changing trip that you cannot regret. Whether you are taking personal or vacation days off from work, or you are asking your college professors for permission to miss class, there is NO reason not to take advantage of a FREE TRIP!

3. The Soldiers. About half way through the trip, usually on day 5, you are joined by Israeli soldiers who are the same age range as you are. You get to meet these Israeli soldiers and travel along their side, learning all about them. You’ll find out they’re the kindest, smartest and most passionate people you will ever meet, and most likely become life long friends.

4. Happy People. Everyone just wants to be friends with everyone and have a great time together in Israel! You will make lifelong friends and memories and it is truly amazing. Birthright even offers to PAY FOR YOUR WEDDING if you meet the man or woman of your dreams while on one of their trips. Pretty cool, right?

5. The Food! Hummus. More hummus. Falafel. Fresh Israeli food. It is all so fresh and delicious.

6. The breathtaking beauty at the top of Mt. Masada. This is a hike that you will start in the middle of the night, in order to be at the top for the sunrise, and it is the most beautiful sunrise you may ever see.

7. Connections! The Jewish community is a small world in itself where we all know someone who knows someone else. And someone on your birthright trip is bound to be your college friend’s best friend from home, or your brothers girlfriends sister, or your moms old neighbor… Either way, you’ll know more people than you thought you would, and will leave with more friends than you thought was possible.

8. Shabbat in Israel. It makes you feel so close to everyone and gives you such an appreciation for your religion that you even daydream of following the tradition of Shabbat on a regular basis.

9. The Dead Sea. From the exciting experience of floating in a body of water, to the indescribable smoothness your skin exudes after covering yourself it its’ rich mineral filled mud, the Dead Sea is one of the coolest parts of the whole trip!

10. Your tour guide. He or she really does love you. And even more, they really LOVE Israel. They overflow with love and passion and knowledge for their country. They are there with you to show you around, and to make sure that you will have a fabulous trip. They are also some of the best people in the world.

So what are you waiting for?! Sign up for the next Birthright Trip here!